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Mark Godfrey: the US Constitution is illegal

This is a letter sent to me by Mark Godfrey after he read this site.

Dear Sir,

Great web-site! Hilarious!

But on a serious note, Sir, I would like to know how you feel about the Constitution of the US being illegal. I don't mean illegal in the abstract sense, for surely this is the case. I mean illegal, Period. If you hold the Constitution you are holding an illegal document, since the Constitution is of course written on Hemp paper, and this contains THC and thus violates 'zero-tolerance'. This zero-tolerance has been used to make birdseed illegal since it contains 0.0001% THC by the Clinton administration and US government. Hemp paper would have analogous amounts of this dreaded drug, and should be apparently be seized immediately.

The Constitution has been ignored since the 1972 CSA act, so why not just outlaw the whole damn document, and therefore get around all those troubling 'freedoms' it talks of. It just makes the masses more un-manageable. 'Zero-tolerance' seems a great place to start!

Hmmm, Canada seems to have a Constitution. Wonder if they have computer jobs??

Mark Godfrey
net engineer


The Declaration, the Constitution, and the Bill of Rights are currently housed in the National Archives. All three are written on parchment, not hemp paper. Parchment is treated animal skin, typically sheepskin. The Declaration was inked with iron gall ink. The Jet Propulsion Laboratory was commissioned to create a system to monitor the physical status of all three. The Charters of Freedom Monitoring System took digital photos of each sheet of parchment in 1987, each document divided into one-inch squares. Over time, the photos are retaken and compared to the original to look for signs of deterioration. Before the charters were recently reencased for display, a small tear in the Declaration was repaired by adding Japanese paper to the gap. This is the only paper in any of the documents. It is, then, inaccurate to say that any of these documents was written on hemp.

However, many other old documents and books might be printed on hemp paper.

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